I took to Facebook to come up with questions for Friday. Yeah, I know it's not Friday anymore but I can't just stop time so that I can write a blog when I said I would, can I? Wait, can I? I didn't even explore that option, honestly. So I'm answering all of the questions that do not have scientific or mathmatical or otherwise googleable answers. Although I do just love the way it sounds to say, "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? " Thank you for that, Katie.
From Jamie: If you had $1000.00 to spend, but you could only purchase 1 thing with that money (and you can't pay bills with it), what would you buy? I would buy a new couch. Something bold. Something that you can't lose stuff underneath. Something... oh, yes. Something like this. Yes, that color.
Also from Jamie: If you were to live in any other country, what would it be? Iceland. And yes, that choice was made as a direct result of seeing the Sigur Ros DVD, Heima.
From Katie: What's your favorite candy that's ONLY available around certain holidays? Do You stock up on it? Do you even care? This one is easy. When I was little, at Valentines Day they used to have suckers called Luv Pops. And I could swear that they used to have Mickie and Minnie on them but after the advent of the internet, I think I've determined that it's just some generic woodland creatures. I think that my mind, when I was little I so badly wanted the name-brand stuff that maybe I just made it up. These are not your cheap, heart-shaped lollipops with white, chalk drawings that make your tongue look nasty. I remember that they didn't have any sharp edges at all and they have a completely smooth texture and I loved them so much. I don't stock up because they've vanished from everywhere except the internet. But I don't want to buy them on the internet--it's not totally the suckers themselves, it's the nostalgia.
From Nickie: If you had to describe yourself as an animal, which animal would you choose and why? I'm not really an animal lover (I know, gasp and horror, right) so it's hard for me to identify with one. But I will try--for you. I want to say "peacock" because it's the most beautiful creature this side of Eden but I can't think of anything we've got in common except that we both want to go back in time to live on Flannery O'Connor's farm.
From Gina: Making any more trips to Bolivar? Bolivar, MO is the only place, outside of a zoo, that I have seen peacocks. They just hang out in the freakin' park, you guys! They're so pretty. Anyway, to answer the question, sadly, not in the forseeable future. But I may be trucking it up to Kansas City this summer. Meet me half-way, my dear. Meet me half-way.
Also from Gina: How was your day at work today? It was great. We were super busy which meant the day went by very quickly. Also I got to flirt with couple of old men and, I think we all know how much I love to do that.
Also from Gina: What do you do when someone has really bad breath? Ugh. You mean at work or in real life? At work, I angle myself away but sometimes there's just no getting around it and you have to turn your focus to not making a face. That is hard for me. In real life, I don't think that I deal with people who have bad breath. I think that all of my friends are delightfully fresh. That's the thing about being a modern-day, single late-20-something. Everyone's got gum. Be prepared.
Ope! Here's Nickie again: If you had no social sensor, what would be some things that you would just LOVE to say to some people at work? I really was going to ignore this question as it could get me into trouble but today I just can't hold back. I would say, "Are you serious?! There was a freakin tsunami and, like, the biggest friggin earthquake in a bazillion years and hundreds and hundreds of people are dead. Our friend, here, is freaking out because her son is stationed in Japan and you're pissed off because they interrupted The Young and the Restless to tell you about it?! Gaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!" And then I would make a lot of noises that are just hard to spell.
Nickie is on a roll: What are a few of your favorite(est) words? "Damnit." It's my favorite word. It always has been and I don't know why. However, if we're talking about words that you can actually use in front of a crowd of people, well, here's a list: "arbitrary", "strange", "liaison", "impose", "brother".
Emily: What's with today, today? Emily just gets me.
Jen: If you could have any super power, what would it be? I don't want no superpowers except for the power to never use a double-negative.
Jen, again: Pen or pencil? I've talked about this before, I think, somewhere. Blue, bic, ball-point, click-top pen. Preferably with a rejected logo.
Jen, one more time: What is your favorite coin and why? Quarters--they're the only things that feel like money.
Sarah: What are some of your favorite baby names? I like old-lady names for girls. I like little girls that are named things like Eva and Violet and Mae. I like it when little boys have names from books. I met a little guy named "Scout" recently and I thought that was awesome (Yes, I know that Scout was a girl but are we really going to argue that it's a girl name? I doubt it). I also love the name Oliver. I like to imagine that 25 years from now someone will say, "I had this friend in college named Oliver." I mean--that guy seems cool, right?
From Jivan: How did Oprah become the bane of existence? Well, Jivan, the answer is that she's everywhere. She's everywhere and she has... you know, dogs and a Stedman. And that's annoying, I guess. I don't know. I think it's because all life is a big High School and everyone hates the happy, popular girl who's always taking people on vacations to Australia. Everyone, except, you know, the people who get to go to Australia.
Also from Jivan: How did mustache become all-powerful? I'm... not going to comment on that. But it does have to do with why Stedman and Oprah have been together for a million years.
Again from Jivan: Why am I hungover? Because you did terrible things to your body last night and your liver has been poisoned and is trying to run away from you. That's why. Drink three glasses of water and watch an Intervention marathon. You'll be fine just in time for St. Patrick's day.
Ryan: Why do you need three questions? I don't. Thanks for your help, though.