Tuesday, February 1, 2011

The Classiest Post Ever Written by L.M. Parker

Something you probably know about me: I really, really like to cook. And I really, really like to blog. And don't get used to it or anything, but today was kind of a boring, snowed-in, listening-to-indie-chill-on-slacker.com kind of day and nothing puts me in the mood to photograph my lunch and put it on the internets quite like blizzard conditions and William Fitzsimmons. Ohmahgah, I would serve him lunch. I would serve him lunch so hard.

Also, after the post I wrote yesterday, my older brother implored me to "bring back the class." This request did leave me a little confused, though because I didn't think that a childhood story about the first time I heard the f-word was terribly unclassy, relatively speaking, and also it made me wonder about a time when this space was particularly classy. He must have been talking about this post. Or this one.

Things that are classy: champagne (but not too much), pearls (unless you think about where they actually come from), and old ladies wearing lots of jewelry. But few things in life are classier than fashioning a lunch out of the weird crap that you find in the fridge, so that's what I did. I got all Paula Deen up in hurr (if Paula Deen's fridge was filled with a bag of frozen vegetables, a box of baking soda and a case of Free State Wheat. I'm pretty confident that it does not.).

If you're anything like me, in the wintertime your vegetable reception takes a turn for the worse. I don't know why but when it's cold outside, the only vegetable that I want to have anything to do with is a potato. In all of its glorious forms. But today I was requiring some vitamins and protein (since yesterday all I ate was rice and toast). I did have a bag of frozen vegetables and a dozen eggs and I thought, quiche for one! So my brains got pretty set on that idea. Then I remembered that I don't have any pie crust or a pie plate and also that it's mostly impossible to make a quiche for just one person. But I was still excited, so I put my noggin to good, creative use, and I decided to make a "hashbrown" "crust" and to bake it in my gigantic, oven-safe bowl. I know that it is oven safe because I watched it go into a kiln. I wouldn't go just throwin' anything into the oven if I was you. That would be a poor decision that would result in, probably, the most disgusting mess your oven will ever know. But enough, on with the "recipe" for, what I'm going to call:

Quiche-Kinda
To make your quiche-kinda, you will need these kinds of things.
Super important information: cook those vegetables. Cook the hell out of them. I had this "Asian" blend that didn't have anything like baby corns or water chestnuts or sugar snap peas in it. It was mostly broccoli, asparagus, red peppers and yellow squash--all delicious things. Cook them and press all of the water out and then let them cool down. Nothing hot and wet is allowed in this quiche-kinda. Classy, Libby. Gotta stay classy.


Slice your potato all up and then layer it in your bowl. No, not, like layered as in multiple layers, more like a layer of potatoes. Because this is your "crust". In retrospect, you should probably just shred that potato. Oh, and I didn't mention this but I put some milk in there with those eggs and other things.



I don't know why the butter needs to go on top. You already Pamed the hell out of the bowl and filled it with eggs and filled it with cheese, does a girl really need another source of cholesterol?

Let me link you to Hilah's recipes, because they're awesome. The recipe you can see, is her recipe for tortillas. And the recipe you can't see, is her recipe for peach cobbler that is... well, frankly something that I would make love to were it a possibility. But it is not. #classyfail

How did I know that this was done? Well, let me tell you a secret, I didn't. I guessed. But I did guess based on a few different things. A. It had been about a half an hour and I was getting impatient. B. When I shook the bowl (while holding a pot-holder, jeesh), it was not jiggly. So I took it out. And I started eating. Bad idea. That shit was hot. Also, if you let it sit for a few minutes, it sets up really nice and won't get watery or anything. There's nothing classy about a leaky quiche-kinda.

Have a classy day.

3 comments:

Lucy said...

That sounds like about 95% of my recipes.

Curly-T said...

In an effort to elear the pantry and save money on groceries, we've started doing this exact same thing!
It actually has turned into some yummy meals, but I wouldn't recommend ever eating cook and serve pudding unless it's been in the fridge at least 12 hours. Even if you have 3 boxes because you accidently bought cook & serve instead of instant - let it cool first!!

tracey.becker1@gmail.com said...

Ok, how do you do all of those cool word inserts? It is awesome and I always wondered but never figured it out but I simply MUST find out so that I can copy this post, word for word, especially the eyeballs on the eggs deal-io.

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