Well, I live in McPherson now. I'm not completely certain how I feel about it yet. I probably won't feel awesome until the apartment opens upstairs and I'll get a place to live that is not my brother and sister-in-law's hide-a-bed in the living room. We've got a collection of things growing in the garage that will be used to fill my place once it becomes available. I really, truly, can't wait to have a place of my own. I don't even have to paint it at this point. I just want a place to sleep where there aren't three-year-olds jumping on my bed demanding that I wake up because she wants to watch PBS. Not that I don't love it--but sometimes it's nice to sleep past 6:45. Sometimes it's nice to lounge around your house without a bra on for a few hours before getting ready for the day. I am being made more and more aware of just how much you can hear from the people upstairs which leads me to believe that I'm going to have to invest in some rugs for sound prevention.

I've never been one to question whether or not I'm doing the right thing. I had nightly panic-attacks when I was trying to decide where to go to college and for a semester after I got there. Ever since, I've ridden a philosophy of "Well, this is how it is so we might as well make it look nice." Nothing ever feels right but nothing ever feels wrong either. Sometimes some things feel considerably less right than other things. I'm currently in a battle between "did I totally ruin this?" and "what's done is done." I suppose it just makes sense to get over and move on but sometimes, most especially at night, I have a few feelings that seem too close to regrets to be anything else. But I know that feelings are not reality and I have done the very best with what I had at my disposal and in twenty years I won't regret having done what I've done. I am certain of that.

I had an interview at Mainstreet Deli which is two blocks from where I am living. It's a really adorable place. Lots of sandwiches, soup, salads--that type of stuff. But they also make all their own baked goods, pies, cookies, bread, etc. Kim isn't hiring for any full-time positions but she has a few different part time ones and said that I was "an employer's dream." She needs someone to do waitressing and someone to come in at 4:00 am to do baking. That's my type of job. Until I get my masters and until the economy jumps back up (which they say will happen but my brother seems to dispute pretty heavily) these are the sort of jobs that I'll be taking. Lucky for me, I'm good at these sorts of jobs and I really enjoy them. Sadly, though, they pay just barely over minimum wage. But I'm single. I just pay for little old me. I get by. I'll be fine. And I'll bring home pastries.